Friday, 20 July 2012

frazzled...





Brain is completely fried and dead at the moment. Was going to put up a bit more of a posting today but come to writing it, my headspace is completely vacant right now...how fustrating!
Its been a long day, going back to my old school where I left in 2001and seeing old faces, plus the meds is making me all ...weird and reflective i guess... It left me thinking "what am I gunna do with this one life I have right now? Where do I do, what do I do, who do I become?"
it has unconsiously made me edgy, i find i'm grinding and gritting my teeth together and only realise im doing it when my whole face aches!
Plus meeting people and seeing people on the internet and in the world doing that little bit more than you makes you feel a little bit of a failure and out the loop.
I guess I'm feeling out of synch and still recovering, i guess i'm more hurting and in pain than i realised.
I wonder how this will shape me when i recover...if i ever do?
I havent really got any fight in me and to be honest, I'm not really wanting to fight or do anything as such. Life can roll me over and squash me if it wants!

anyway...above is a drawing I drew, a quick 20 minute doodle testingsome new pens i got. Just trying to get back on the horse with the drawing side of things, especially trying to retrain my hand after the accident to grip and everything...gah!

birdie love
xxx

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