right now...

cheese lover-thats me!

• Im watching Age on Consent starring a very young and beautiful Helen Mirren in the stunningly beautiful film. It has made me think of sun-bleached hair, golden skin and white beaches of summer! its a beautiful film and inspirational in the strangest of ways.

•  Cant get enough of cheese! cheese on everything if I had it my way! Im looking forward to tucking into a wonderful array of cheeses over christmas. I might try for the first time a little bit of port with the stuff maybe?

• feeling very fustrated at the moment. the momentum of life right now for me is a little off and i can't seem to retain my focus very well or remember things i need or suppose to do. I look for things to distract me and things to do yet come home and slep my head as i remember I didnt achieve what I set out for in the first place!

• I can feel my fearless and creative side in me slowly building. ideas are taking roots and projects are forming with true depth and meaning. Not just a feeble attempt to look cool and "interesting" but proper "Sorry, this is who I am and if you don't like it - go away!"

• Looking forward to curry night with my two quirkiest comrades, Darren and Sarah! I prctically been dreaming about curries and spices for the last few nights and I'm heading down to my favourite curry house, Eastern Eye for my favourites and a chance to, with Darren order what we fancy and be food critics for the night!

•  My little jo-jo is getting her first ever Ink! She getting a small Pug and I love her design and tattoo artist so, I will be there to hold her hand. Bless her! I know, no doubt I will be finding it very hard to leave without wanting to get inked again myself! I been wanting a star for ages as it is!

•  Loving the cold mornings and the crispy snap of frost under your feet as jack frost nips at your fingers and toes. Everything feels minty fresh and clean!

• thinking how proud I am of myself with therapy. especially right now whe i have reason to be upset and lo, i'm doing really well and handling any negative moments better than I thought I would. Its still really early baby-step days but its a start!

• So proud of my mum for finally getting back onto the job market after taking a year out to look after me and make sure I'm still here to this day. She starts her new job in the new year which is brilliant for her and she deserves so much!

• I acknowledge that to be here still, to celebrate christmas this year is an amazement in itself. Back in february, there was no way I planned to be here on this earth to celebrate late summer, let alone christmas. The people who were close to me and saw how bad it got, even they acknowledged I wasn't loooking great to last the year out but here I am! And like I said to my muma, I'm just going to enjoy it and figure out my life from here as in a way, its a fresh start and a begining in a sense.

Whats on your mind at the moment?

Birdie Love
xxx